skotch

Re: A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To the Forum

Happy New Year everyone....

thought my new girlfriend was great. But after noseying through her knicker drawer and finding a nurse's uniform. a french maid's outfit and a police woman's uniform, I dumped her..... It's obvious, she can't hold down a job...
===============================================================

Men are tricked into believing they're marrying nymphomaniacs.

The problem is, after a few years, the nympho leaves...
but the maniac stays...
===============================================================
Scared the postman today by going to the door completely naked.

I'm not sure what scared him more, my naked body or the fact that I knew where he lived?
===============================================================


While my wife researched her family tree, I went through the parish records.

I found out that the vicar's a big Wham! fan.
==============================================================

Pearls of Wisdom:
1. Money cannot buy happiness but somehow, it's more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes Benz than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy but remember the b*st*rd's name.
3. Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you he's in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problem, but then neither does milk
==============================================================

Getting winter coat ready for Poland...ttfn